Did anyone watch? If so, aren't you ashamed of yourself?

"For weeks, ABC has been dangling snippets of the upcoming interview that promise some kind of revelation or intimacy; when, as instructed, we tune in to watch, we're upbraided for having been interested, then offered a drop of Jolie juice, then scolded again. How can we even think about such things when children are starving in Africa?

But look: Brad and Angelina are so hot together!"

(By the way . . . the first sentence of the final paragraph is absolutely a shout-out to Fametracker.)