Tom Cruise . . . maniac?
You might have heard about my Tom Cruise theories.
You might even scoff at them. But have you read the Tom Cruise profile in Rolling Stone #956? Jack T. was nice enough to give me the issue over the weekend and it paints the picture of a, shall we say, focused Mr. Cruise.
Sure, he's driven. All of the characters that he has played in any film have been driven toward something, away from something. They are focused, passionate. But this article shows the drive of someone how has the unnatural drive of someone who is . . . hmmm . . . a bit off?
So here I am blatantly ripping off text from the article and then providing my commentary.
1) "[I]n his movies, he is taking steps to shed his old persona of headstrong-young-hotshot-with-a-good heart-underneath-it-all in favor of progressively more evil characters--from Lestat in Interview with a Vampire to Frank "T.J." Mackey in Magnolia to Vincent in . . . Collateral. . . . Vincent is not a nice guy. He is a cold-blooded killer and an unredeemable sociopath who leaves a trail of bodies in his wake." Now the article did not underline that part, but I thought it was relevant. Call me crazy, or maybe, call him crazy.
2) "He reaches his right hand out to shake mine as a gesture of approval. When his hand grips mine, his elbow comes flying out of nowhere and slams into my chest, knocking me off balance. He has a habit of making great bonding alpha-male gestures of body contact. When you've said something that earns his agreement or respect, you get a firm handshake. Respect mixed with encouragement earns you a spine-collapsing clap on both shoulders. And if he feels a little healthy surprise, you get the flying elbow to the chest." That's just weird . . . and bruising.
3) "Cruise considers the idea [about an action hero being able to live after the Apocalypse]. In fact, there's nothing that you can say that he won't seriously consider. He pays attention, almost to a fault. 'I can live out in the woods, ' he begins, 'I would eat bugs. I can use a sword and a pistol and stuff.'" Real sword/pistol or just the fake, prop kind? And again, weird.
4) "In movie after movie, he has played the straight man in order to enable great performances by his co-stars, whether it be Dustin Hoffman in Rain Man, Cuba Gooding, Jr. in Jerry Maguire, Paul Newman in The Color of Money or Jack Nicholson in A Few Good Men." Nothing negative to say about Cruise, but I must take issue with the journalist here. I get that he is trying to point out that most of these guys got Oscars for their performance in Tom Cruise movies, but still . . . with the glaring exception of Cuba, these are legendary actors! Should we quietly celebrate Cruise's intelligence by implying he graciously stepped aside to allow these guys to shine?
5) "[W]e discuss his criteria for the perfect mate. Suddenly, Cruise snaps his fingers loudly. An epiphany has been reached. 'I'd like to be with a woman who goes [he switches into a woman's voice], 'I've reviewed your schedule, and I'm going to set up this motorcycle trip for you, because you've been working really hard. And I'm going to go with you. We're going to go riding together. And I've already been working on it for a couple of days so it can be special.' . . . 'That woman,' he concludes, 'I would worship.'" Two things here: First, setting unrealistic expectations for others only leads to disappointment, which can lead to rage and unhealthy, or may I say--antisocial, lashing out. Second, talking in unnatural voices is another sign of being crazy.
6) "Do you ever lose your cool? Yeah, I lose my cool. But I'm not a hothead. I'm not someone who screams at people. It takes a lot. It depends on the situation, know what I mean? You look at something and you think 'How much is it going to take to get it done?' Because nothing keeps me from doing something--ha ha HA HA hee hee, you gotta know, [journalist name], heh heh, you gotta know, ha ha--it's gonna get done Man that is just NUTS! Sure, Cruise is know for boisterous laughter during interviews, but this whole sequence in unnerving! And then there is this seemingly tossed away comment a few seconds later in the article. When things start to get chaotic, I get calmer. If I get upset or freak out, it's not going to help a situation." Strange calmness in the face of calamity is another sign of the serial killer mind, or so I have heard. Or maybe that is just a rumor that I am pursuing.
7) People talk about it whatever it may be--I do. I just do. . . . [Cruise] is strong-willed, centered and resolute. Any thinking that must be done, any turmoil that must be handled is solved first and foremost in a dialogue between Tom Cruise and himself. Other than sounding like a certain out-of-touch with reality president, talking to oneself is another sign of an unhinged mind.
8) [Cruise] must go. When he lean in to bat me on the shoulder, I'm prepared to not be knocked off balance. And I'm prepared for the vigorous double-hand clasp goodbye. But what I'm not ready for is his action-packed goodbye. Just as he reaches the door, he turns around, leaps into a crouch, puts his hands in a karate position and widens his eyes. It is his way of saying, 'Catch you around.' Man, that is just creepy! Still want to defend him?]
You might even scoff at them. But have you read the Tom Cruise profile in Rolling Stone #956? Jack T. was nice enough to give me the issue over the weekend and it paints the picture of a, shall we say, focused Mr. Cruise.
Sure, he's driven. All of the characters that he has played in any film have been driven toward something, away from something. They are focused, passionate. But this article shows the drive of someone how has the unnatural drive of someone who is . . . hmmm . . . a bit off?
So here I am blatantly ripping off text from the article and then providing my commentary.
1) "[I]n his movies, he is taking steps to shed his old persona of headstrong-young-hotshot-with-a-good heart-underneath-it-all in favor of progressively more evil characters--from Lestat in Interview with a Vampire to Frank "T.J." Mackey in Magnolia to Vincent in . . . Collateral. . . . Vincent is not a nice guy. He is a cold-blooded killer and an unredeemable sociopath who leaves a trail of bodies in his wake." Now the article did not underline that part, but I thought it was relevant. Call me crazy, or maybe, call him crazy.
2) "He reaches his right hand out to shake mine as a gesture of approval. When his hand grips mine, his elbow comes flying out of nowhere and slams into my chest, knocking me off balance. He has a habit of making great bonding alpha-male gestures of body contact. When you've said something that earns his agreement or respect, you get a firm handshake. Respect mixed with encouragement earns you a spine-collapsing clap on both shoulders. And if he feels a little healthy surprise, you get the flying elbow to the chest." That's just weird . . . and bruising.
3) "Cruise considers the idea [about an action hero being able to live after the Apocalypse]. In fact, there's nothing that you can say that he won't seriously consider. He pays attention, almost to a fault. 'I can live out in the woods, ' he begins, 'I would eat bugs. I can use a sword and a pistol and stuff.'" Real sword/pistol or just the fake, prop kind? And again, weird.
4) "In movie after movie, he has played the straight man in order to enable great performances by his co-stars, whether it be Dustin Hoffman in Rain Man, Cuba Gooding, Jr. in Jerry Maguire, Paul Newman in The Color of Money or Jack Nicholson in A Few Good Men." Nothing negative to say about Cruise, but I must take issue with the journalist here. I get that he is trying to point out that most of these guys got Oscars for their performance in Tom Cruise movies, but still . . . with the glaring exception of Cuba, these are legendary actors! Should we quietly celebrate Cruise's intelligence by implying he graciously stepped aside to allow these guys to shine?
5) "[W]e discuss his criteria for the perfect mate. Suddenly, Cruise snaps his fingers loudly. An epiphany has been reached. 'I'd like to be with a woman who goes [he switches into a woman's voice], 'I've reviewed your schedule, and I'm going to set up this motorcycle trip for you, because you've been working really hard. And I'm going to go with you. We're going to go riding together. And I've already been working on it for a couple of days so it can be special.' . . . 'That woman,' he concludes, 'I would worship.'" Two things here: First, setting unrealistic expectations for others only leads to disappointment, which can lead to rage and unhealthy, or may I say--antisocial, lashing out. Second, talking in unnatural voices is another sign of being crazy.
6) "Do you ever lose your cool? Yeah, I lose my cool. But I'm not a hothead. I'm not someone who screams at people. It takes a lot. It depends on the situation, know what I mean? You look at something and you think 'How much is it going to take to get it done?' Because nothing keeps me from doing something--ha ha HA HA hee hee, you gotta know, [journalist name], heh heh, you gotta know, ha ha--it's gonna get done Man that is just NUTS! Sure, Cruise is know for boisterous laughter during interviews, but this whole sequence in unnerving! And then there is this seemingly tossed away comment a few seconds later in the article. When things start to get chaotic, I get calmer. If I get upset or freak out, it's not going to help a situation." Strange calmness in the face of calamity is another sign of the serial killer mind, or so I have heard. Or maybe that is just a rumor that I am pursuing.
7) People talk about it whatever it may be--I do. I just do. . . . [Cruise] is strong-willed, centered and resolute. Any thinking that must be done, any turmoil that must be handled is solved first and foremost in a dialogue between Tom Cruise and himself. Other than sounding like a certain out-of-touch with reality president, talking to oneself is another sign of an unhinged mind.
8) [Cruise] must go. When he lean in to bat me on the shoulder, I'm prepared to not be knocked off balance. And I'm prepared for the vigorous double-hand clasp goodbye. But what I'm not ready for is his action-packed goodbye. Just as he reaches the door, he turns around, leaps into a crouch, puts his hands in a karate position and widens his eyes. It is his way of saying, 'Catch you around.' Man, that is just creepy! Still want to defend him?]
posted by Anonymous at 10:20 PM
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